I Don't Understand
by Logie My Knight N Shining Amor
Summary: "So why is your dad here?" Carlos was the first to break the silence. Kendall had a hard look on his face like he was looking for the answer in his brain. He thought for at least five minutes and then shrugged.  "I have no idea Carlos."
1. Chapter 1

**YEAH! My first Fan Fic! I worked really hard on this and I really hope you guys like it.**

**Basically its about Kendall and his relationship with his dad. I want it to be at least twenty chapters an d I want to update every week. If I don't update one week then I'll update an extra long on the week after. Enjoy the story!**

"_Daddy what are you doing?" A five-year-old Kendall Knight walked in his father's room to find him drinking some 'grown-up juice' as Kendall liked to call it. Kendall was actually looking for his mother, but he stumbled upon his alcoholic father instead._

"_What does it look like I'm doing?" Kendall could barely make out the slurred words that came out of his dad's mouth._

"_Daddy, where's mommy?" _

"_How the hell should I know where that whore is?" Kendall flinched at the sound of his father's harsh words. The only time he'd ever heard them was on TV when he was watching Family Guy._

"_Go to your room!" Kendall stood at the foot of the bed, not moving an inch. His father got off the bed and walked over to the five-year-old. _

"_Did you hear what I said? I said go. to. your. room!" Next thing Kendall knew, he was on the ground clutching his stomach in pain. He looked to his dad in fear and crawled to his room. Similar things happened throughout the course of Kendall's life, getting worse as he grew older. Kendall was grateful when it all ended, when his mom finally got the divorce. _

"Kendall, I need you to clean your room. Your father's coming to visit." It had taken Kendall a moment to process what his mom just said. Once he did, his eyes were as wide as the plates his mom set out for dinner.

"He's what!"

"He's coming to visit. Is there a problem?" Kendall stood in shock at his mother's words. The man that had abused him for years, the man that treated him like he was nothing, was coming, to Minnesota, to visit, Kendall.

"Sweetheart, I know you don't like you father, but can you act civil while he's here." Kendall glanced at his mom's hopeful face and sighed. He could never say no to his mom.

"Fine, I'll try to be nice to him. Keyword try. If I end up knocking him over, its not my fault." His mother grinned at him and told him, she'd do something special for him and Katie when their dad left. He mumbled some not-so-nice words as he slumped back to his room.

'An entire week with my dad?' Kendall thought. 'This won't end well.'

Logan Mitchell always knew when his friends were in trouble. More specifically, he always knew when _Kendall _was in trouble. It was like he was Spiderman and his "Kendall" senses were tingling. Kendall and Logan were so different, but so similar at the same time. You know what I mean? Well, anyways, Logan knew that from the moment Kendall stepped foot in the school that morning, that there was something bothering him.

"Alright what gives?" Kendall looked at the shorter boy and sighed.

"It's nothing Logan." Logan had prepared for this. He knows how stubborn Kendall can be. Only Logan knows how to make him crack. He's been doing it for years.

"Kendall, you and I both know that's not the case. We both also know, that im going to get it out of you sooner or later so you might as well tell me now and skip all the frustration and yelling later." Kendall looked at him with a knowing look. He grabbed Logan by the arm and dragged him to an empty hallway. Logan know it was bad if he had to say it here. This was the only hallway in school that no one else knew about. The guys used it when they wanted to skip class, or needed to get something serious off they're chests.

"Ok so, yesterday my mom told me some…shocking news." Logan thought up all the possibilities there could be. Was he moving? Did his grandmother die? Does Mrs. Knight have cancer? Was he adopted? The possibilities were endless. Logan would've thought of more, but Kendall interrupted his train of thought.

"Logan. My, my dad is… he's coming to visit." Logan had a look of horror on his face as soon as he realized what this meant.

"It's alright buddy. If you want James, Carlos and I can sleepover this weekend. And we'll come over everyday after school." Kendall stared at Logan and wondered how he got so lucky to have the best friends in the world.

The day had arrived when Kenneth Knight had come back to town. He hasn't been to Shakopee in years. Wait, scratch that, he hasn't been to _Minnesota_ in years. He hasn't even talked to his son since the divorce. He had some plans in store for his kids. Especially Kendall. He hated Kendall more than anything in the world. The day he was born was the worst day in his life, according to Mr. Knight.

He walked up to the Knight apartment and rang the doorbell. The door opened up, to reveal a boy, no older than Kendall, with spiky dark-brown hair. He had on the most nerdy looking sweater vest Kenneth had ever seen. The boy frowned as soon as he saw who it was, and tried to slam the door in his face. At the last minute, Kenneth, stuck his foot between the door and the door frame and pushed it open, knocking the poor boy down.

"Hello Kendall, It's been a while." Kendall looked up from the computer to make eye contact with the man he dare call dad.

"Dad. These are my friends." Kendall pointed to the one struggling to get up from the ground after getting hit with the door. "That's Logan." He then pointed to the one bouncing with a helmet in his head. "That's Carlos." And lastly, he pointed to the handsome brunette boy that was combing his already perfect hair. "That's James." Kenneth rolled his eyes.

"I don't really care who your friends are. If they're here for backup, then you guys have another thing coming. Anyways, where's your mother?" Kendall murmured something about his dad being a no good deadbeat and put on his best fake smile.

"She went to the store with Katie. She'll be back soon." Kendall's father ginned evilly and got up from the seat he was sitting in.

"Boys," He said, addressing Logan, James, and Carlos, "Can I have a moment alone with my son?" The boys quickly replied no. This obviously angered Kenneth.

"It was a rhetorical question." The three friends just stood there, pretending they couldn't hear him. "Maybe your parents should come pick you boys up." James snickered and rolled his eyes.

"I don't know if Kendall or Mama Knight told you this, but we're sleeping over this entire week. Our parents are out of town for some work conventions and Mama Knight said we could stay here. So no, our parents shouldn't come pick us up." The boys started laughing at James' retort. Kendall's dad got up and left the room, growling. This is going to be a lot harder than he had originally thought.

Mrs. Knight got home 2 hours later. The boys all scrambled into the kitchen when she told them the she had bought dinosaur chicken nuggets. She called her ex-husband out for dinner. After thirty minutes of waiting for him, she walked into the guest room to find him fast asleep. She went back to the kitchen to find the boys finished with their dinosaur chicken nuggets. Even Katie was still on her fourth one. She shook her head and walked over the oven to make the boys a second batch.

"You boys eat like pigs." Mrs. Knight commented on how fast the boys finished their food. They grinned at her and headed to Kendall's room.

"So why is your dad here?" Carlos was the first to break the silence. Kendall had a hard look on his face like he was looking for the answer in his brain. He thought for at least five minutes and then shrugged.

"I have no idea Carlos. He hasn't been in my life for nine years, I don't why he's coming back all of a sudden." The boys sat through the awkward silence that lasted for what seemed like forever. Finally Mama Knight walked in and called lights out. The boys settled in their sleeping bags and shut their eyes shut, hoping they could figure out some stuff out about Kendall's dad the next day.

**What did you think? Was it good, should I continue it? Thanks for reading! Don't forget to review and favorite!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks sooooo much for all of the reviews! It means a lot! I'm glad you like the story! BTW, to those with concerns, I'm going to put a flashback in each chapter. And to avoid any confusion, Kendall is 14, Logan is 14, James is 15, and Carlos is 14. Oh, and in the last chapter, they took a bus to IHOP.**

**Disclaimer: Yup. I gained magic powers last night and used them to steal the guys. So no, I don't own Big Time Rush. I only own the plot and any OC's that may or may not appear.**

**Enjoy the Story!**

* * *

><p><em>Kendall was ecstatic! Today was James' birthday party. There was going to be a cool band and a bouncy house! Kendall put on his clothes and went to get his mom. He walked by his parents' room and heard yelling. The blonde boy tiptoed over to the door and leaned his ear against it.<em>

"_WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE PREGNANT?" Kendall winced at sound of his dad's booming voice._

"_Ken, lower your voice. Kendall is in the house."_

"_I don't give a damn if that little brat is in the house." A little whimper escaped Kendall's mouth. Did his dad dislike him that much? And what did pregnant mean? Was his mom dying! Oh no! He needs to ask Logan at the party. Kendall scurried back his room and grabbed James' gift. It was a comb. Kendall knows James will love. Kendall was so busy admiring his gift for James, he didn't notice his dad enter his room. He turned around when he heard a growl. When he saw it was his dad, his face lightened up._

"_Oh, hi daddy! I was just getting ready for the party." His dad didn't say anything. The only sound you could hear was a loud SMACK! Kendall tumbled on the ground and held his cheek. He got up and ran to his mom. She asked what was wrong, and him being the smart kid he is, just said he fell off his bed. Jennifer cleaned him up and they took off to James' house. Kendall ran straight to Logan when thy got to the party._

"_LOGAN! I need to ask you something important!" Logan jumped as he saw the taller boy running towards him._

"_Logan. What does 'pregnant' mean?" _

"_Well, my mommy and daddy said that it means, that this bird put a seed inside of your mommy's tummy, and it grows and grows and then a baby is made!" Kendall's mout was in and "O" shape._

"_My mommy's having a baby?"_

* * *

><p>Kendall woke up to the sweet aroma of pancakes. He followed the mouthwatering scent to the kitchen and was disappointed when he saw who was already sitting at the table. He was even more disappointed when he saw that his dad had eaten five pancakes and left only one for him and his friends each.<p>

"Mom, there's only four left. Can you make a few more?" Mrs. Knight gave her son a sad look and shook her head no.

"We're out of pancake batter. I forgot to pick some up at the store yesterday. Sorry honey." Kendall sighed and glared at his dad as soon as his mom was out of sight.

"You're such an ass." He walked out of the kitchen and went to wake the guys. He told them about the whole pancake ordeal, and they decided to go to Ihop with Katie, considering she didn't get any either.

* * *

><p>"Why does he hate you so much?" James was still a bit confused about all of this. His parents were divorced too, but his dad was always around and he was always caring. Nothing like Kendall's dad whatsoever.<p>

"I don't know! It started when I was five. It was all down hill from there. It wasn't until Katie was three that he decided to just leave. That had to be the best day of my life." The rest of the drive was silent.

* * *

><p>"I'll take the Cinna-stack combo with extra bacon, hash browns, and a hot chocolate. Oh, don't forget the bacon!" Carlos was the last one to order but his order was the biggest.<p>

"Carlos, you one of the reasons this place has so much money." Carlos took that as a compliment and thanked Logan. Kendall and James went into a laughing fit at how oblivious Carlos was. James suddenly became serious, and asked for the guys' attention.

"Ok so, you guys know how I'm going to be famous one day right?" They all rolled they're eyes. James ignored their actions when the food came, then continued to speak.

"Any ways, this Wednesday this big time record producer is holding auditions here in Minnesota!" They all looked at James surprised. He's always talked about becoming famous, he's never actually taken action. Kendall was the first to speak up.

"That's awesome James! And we'll all be there for support." Carlos looked up from his plate and nodded. Logan smiled and agreed. James grinned from ear to ear. He had the best friends in the world.

"So James, when you become a superstar…Can I be your manager?" James actually thought about Katie's offer. Katie handed him her card and went back to eating her pancakes.

"Alright guys, I think it's time to head back. I don't want to torture mom with _him_ any longer." They all nodded in agreement. The each chipped in with the bill and left a generous tip.

"Uh guys, do any of you have money for the bus?" Logan realized he spent all his money on his meal. Apparently, everyone else did, too.

"Well, it looks like we're walking!"

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><p><strong>I liked this chapter! Have you guys heard Epic? I LOVE that song. James writes pretty awesome songs! Anyways, I'm going to start making some drama with Kenneth. Starting with Katie.. *Cue evil laugh* JK. But seriously, this story is rated T, it needs some drama.<strong>

_**DID YOU KNOW:**__**A fourth of all girls and a sixth of boys are sexually abused by an adult before the age of 17.**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry it took so long for me to update. I was hosting a KCA party this weekend. I'm really, really, really, reeaallyy happy BTR won. I sooooo thought they were going to lose to LMFAO. And guess who's going to BTR's summer tour? THIS GIRL!**

**Okay so this chapter might be a little shocking. Yes, something is going to happen to Katie, and based on some of the reviews, you guys know what it's going to be. Anyways, on with the story.**

**Disclaimer. YES! I finally took over the world! Well, the world of my room… So, no I still don't own BTR.**

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><p>"<em>Kendall, I have something to tell you." Jennifer sat her son down on the couch. She said she had some exciting news.<em>

"_What is it?" Kendall loved it when his mommy told him surprises. Last time she told him a surprise, he was getting a hamster! He stll doesn't know what happened to .  
><em>

_"Well... Mommy's having a baby!" Kendall looked at her with a blank face._

_"I know." Jenn was shocked. Kendall knew about the baby? He probably heard her and Ken fighting over it a few weeks ago._

_"I heard you and daddy fighting. Then I heard you say you are preg-a-nat. So at the party, I asked Logan what it is. He said it was when a bird puts a seed in your tummy and makes a baby grow."_

_"Well, Logan is one smarty then, huh?"_

_"Yup."  
><em>

Katie ran back to her room as soon as she set foot in the house. She didn't want to be anywhere near her dad. He was satin, satin with a bad toupee **(1).**

"Back so soon?" Katie jumped n she heard the sound of her dad's voice. She cautiously turned around, only to come face to face with the worst person she's ever met.

"Oh, uh, hi? Why are you in my room?" Katie nervously shook as she felt her dad's hand land on her shoulder. She's seen movies like this. It never ended well.

"What? A father can't come talk to his beautiful daughter." Katie slowly backed away from him, hoping to run to Kendall.

"You know something, I don't really want to talk, so I'll just be leaving now." She tried to make a run for it, but she ended up in her father's grasp instead. He lowered down and whispered in her ear.

"I don't want to talk either." Katie's eyes widened. She screamed Kendall's name, but her dad muffled her mouth with his hand.

"Let's have some fun." He locked and covered the door. He threw Katie on the bed and laughed maliciously. Where was Kendall now?

* * *

><p>"Kendall, can you go get you sister for lunch?" It had been three hours since Kendall had seen Katie. It took them one hour to walk home, and then she was 'talking' to their dad in her room. He opened the door to her room, and found her sitting in a corner.<p>

"Katie? What's wrong?" Kendall walked over and sat down next to her. She sniffled. He looked down at her with a worried look.

"I…I don't want to talk about it."

"If you don't tell me I'll bring the guys in here."

"Kendall, its fine. I'm fine." Kendall sighed.

"You asked for it. LOGAN! CARLOS! JAMES!" The guys rushed into Katie's room in about… point five seconds.

"What happened?"

"Well Logan, Katie is upset, and she's not telling me what's wrong." Logan shook his head.

"Katie, we've known you your entire life, we're practically related** (2)**. What's wrong?" Katie's eyes started to water. She knew she had to tell them. They were her brothers. Plus, they'd find out eventually. She wiped her tears and prepared to brace herself for one the worst moments in her life.

"He…he…I can't say it!" She got up and grabbed a book from her bed. She opened it to a certain page then gave to Logan. His eyes widened as he read. He threw the book to Kendall and started pacing the room. It had a completely different effect on Kendall. He almost ripped the book apart. He quickly got up and ran out the door. James and Carlos picked it up and screamed when they finished reading. Carlos was actually tearing up. James grabbed the hardest thing he could find ( Katie's old tee ball bat), and ran out in the same manor as Kendall. Logan and Carlos stayed comforting Katie.

* * *

><p>"HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO HER! SHE'S EIGHT! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M YOUR SON! I HOPE YOU ROT IN HELL! YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE AND A DIRTBAG AND A HORRIBLE, HORIBLE PERSON!" Kendall was <em>beyond<em> pissed. He was about ready to murder. It wasn't any different with James. Kendall and James both had Mr. Knight surrounded. James with the bat and Kendall with the hockey stick.

"Boys! What is going on here?" Jennifer stood in the living room, confused as to why her son and his best friend were threatening her ex-husband..

"This _ass-_" Jennifer shot James a look."-Jerk did something very _very_ bad to Katie." Kendall whispered something in his mom's here. Whatever it was made her very shocked, and furious.

"KATIE! COME HERE, NOW!" Katie, Logan, and Carlos all hurried out of the room. Jen's eyes became soft when she saw her daughter's red and puffy eyes.

"Kendall, James, go with Carlos, Logan, and Katie. I want to have a word with your father." Kendall shot daggers at his dad.

"Biologically he's my father, but he will NEVER, be family to me." He turned to Kenneth. "I can't wait till you're on your death bed, because when you ask to see your son, the only thing I'm going to tell is, you never had one." With that Kendall and the rest of the group walked into Kendall's room.

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><p><strong>I have to admit, writing this was kind of fun. Most of the stuff Kendall said is what I want to say to my stepdad. Only difference is that, no one in my family has gotten raped and…I'm not as confident as Kendall. Okay so fun facts about the story<strong>

**(1)I got that from Big Time Audition when Logan said "He's satin, satin wearing bug-eye glasses"**

**(2)I was watching How to Rock an Election today. **

**(3)I really wanted to beat Ken up buuuut, it would ruin the next chapter**

**(4)This is totally off topic, but do you guys like 1D? I freakin love them. I have a door sign that says "Welcome to Future Mrs. Harry Styles' Room". You know he's a good rebound if I don't get to marry Logan…**


	4. Chapter 4

**OMG! I'm so sorry I didn't update sooner. I've been busy with Twitter. Getting concert tickets. Since I'm in 2 Fandoms now, I'm kind of preoccupied. I've been getting obsessed with One Direction while waiting for season 3 of BTR. I have a bit of writers block, so ill try to make it long.**

**The flashbacks up to chapter 6 will be about Kendall and his mom. Maybe I'll put his dad in some, but that's only a possibility.**

**Disclaimer: Sure, mhmm. I own BTR, just keep on believing that.**

**I've decided to do song inspirations, so for this chapter the song is: Turn Right~ Jonas Brothers**

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><p>"<em>Mommy! The baby is taking to long!" Jennifer sighed and tried to explain to her, very impatient son, that it takes a while to have a baby.<em>

"_Kendall, I already told you, it takes longer than a week for a baby to grow." That earned her a groan from him._

"_Will the baby be here by my birthday?" Kendall grunted when his mother shook her head no._

"_WHY NOT? Jeez, this baby is a slowpoke." He turned and headed towards his room. He stopped for a short moment and turned around._

"_Is it a girl or a boy?" _

"_I don't know sweetheart." Kendall threw his hands up in the air._

"_You see! The baby IS a slowpoke!" Jen watched as Kendall ran into his room._

"_We'll find out in a few months!" She called out hopefully calming him done a bit. His head poked out of the door a little._

"_Thanks mommy!"_

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><p>"Hi. I'm Officer Baker. I'm here to take Kenneth Knight into custody." After an hour of screaming and yelling, Jen finally told Logan to call the police.<p>

"He's in the guest room." The officer walked past her and into the hallway. He walked into the room and came right back out.

"There's no one in here." She rushed over to see for her self. Kendall, Carlos, and James came out of Katie's room to see what was going on. "Mom? What's going on?" Kendall stood, baffled at his mom's shocked expression.

"Mrs. Knight? Are you ok? What happened?" Carlos began to bombard her with questions. The officer quickly stepped in and answered the questions, resulting in a scream from Carlos, a gasp from James, and a murderous glare from Kendall.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S GONE? WHY WAS HE ALONE IN THE FIRST PLACE?" To say that Kendall was angry would be an understatement. He was livid! The man that abused him as a child, that sexually abused Katie, was gone! That man deserved to be put away for a lifetime! "Kendall, calm down." Carlos tried to make the blonde relax, but instantly regretted doing so. Kendall looked at him as if Carlos was mentally insane. "I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! THAT JACKASS IS ON THE LOOSE WHEN HE SHOULD BE IN PRISON!" Kendall stormed into his room, slamming the door on the way in.

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><p>Katie was bawling her eyes out. Logan kept trying to get her mind off of it, but nothing was helping. Not even the puppet show. She just kept crying. Logan sighed and sat on the bed with her. She flinched when she felt his hand on her back. With Katie in his arms, Logan stroked a hand through her long brown hair, while singing her favorite song.<p>

"_Pick up all your tears  
>Throw em in your back seat<br>Leave without a second glance  
>Somehow I'm to blame<br>For this never-ending racetrack you call life_

_So turn right_  
><em>Into my arms<em>  
><em>Turn right<em>  
><em>You won't be alone<em>  
><em>You might fall off this track sometime<em>  
><em>Hope to see you on the finish line<em>

_You're driving all your friends out_  
><em>You just be, you cannot follow<em>  
><em>And soon you will be on your own<em>  
><em>Somehow I'm to blame<em>  
><em>For this never-ending racetrack you call life<em>

_So turn right_  
><em>Into my arms<em>  
><em>Turn right<em>  
><em>You won't be alone<em>  
><em>You might fall off this track sometime<em>  
><em>Hope to see you on the finish line<em>

_I did all I could_  
><em>I gave everything<em>  
><em>But you had to go your way<em>  
><em>And that road was not for me<em>

_So turn right_  
><em>Into my arms<em>  
><em>Turn right<em>  
><em>You won't be alone<em>  
><em>You might fall off this track sometimes<em>  
><em>Hope to see you on the finish line"<em>

He wasn't the best singer, but Katie didn't seem to mind. Logan looked down in his arms, and was happy to find Katie peacefully sleeping. He laid her on her bed and tucked her in. After shutting off the light and giving her a kiss on the forehead, he silently crept out of her room, and into the living room. He entered, only to find a police officer in the living, talking to a distraught Mrs. Knight.

"Logan! Come here." James called over his very perplexed friend. The shorter boy, began to ask millions of questions, only to be shushed by Carlos. Logan sat quietly, waiting to be told the explanation for all of the commotion.

What he heard was not what he expected at all. How did he escape? Why was that bastard alone in a room with windows? James seemed to notice Logan's confused glances and shrugged. "Well, are they going to catch him?" Logan, sadly, was met with sighs and shrugs.

"We have no idea, Logie. No idea."

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><p>Kendall woke up the next morning, hoping that the last few days had been some messed up dream. Unfortunately, reality hit when he saw his mom and sister in the kitchen, eyes red and puffy from crying. He cautiously walked over to Katie, and began to rub her back gently. She tensed up for a minute, then relaxed once again. Kendall hated seeing Katie like this. She's never looked so…broken. "Are you okay?" Katie looked up from her cereal. Her bottom lip began to tremble.<p>

Kendall instantly regretted asking. He sat down and poured Honey Nut Cheerios into his bowl. He almost forgot about his friends. As if on cue, Logan, James, and Carlos, strolled in, looking like they hadn't gotten sleep in days. James' hair wasn't even done. They all sat at the table in silence. Carlos broke the silence and began to talk about hockey. Kendall joined into the conversation, almost seeming like his normal self. James was talking to Katie about heading to the Mall to pick up some new Cuda product. Lastly, Logan and Mrs. Knight were talking about college, and how Logan wanted to go to medical school as soon as he was out of high school.

Things were slowly going back to normal. That is, until James and Katie found a disturbing note on the front door, while getting back from the mall. They rushed inside to show the others. As soon as everyone was in the same room, Kendall grabbed the note and began to read.

"_So you thought you could get rid of me that easily, huh? Well, you're going to have to try harder than that. I'm going to get my revenge. Especially you, Kendall. Watch your back. You never know where I'll be."_


End file.
